Media Transition Tracker Gifts

"Sorry, boss, but the decline of the printed word has made creating a ransom note increasingly challenging."

The Modern Novel.

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'You do realize you're no longer a pro athlete and there is no preseason to work out the kinks, don't you?'

DVD extras - the making of the boxed set.

Don't touch that dial! — We're experts, and we know what you should be watching!

'Running away from the circus to join the world of accountancy isn't working out as I expected. . .'

As Seen On TV

"Obama planted it."

"What'll it be ... scary movies or scary news?"

RIP journalism

"Great, but where are all the books?"

"The following program contains adult situations designed to make you feel bad about your life."

'We really can't afford golden parachutes any more, but here's a plastic crash helmet.'

In Plain Sight

"Global stocks shot up on news Trump has 'Twitter-block!'"

"Before you go inside, give me a chance to explain the mess ..."

"Let's take it step by step. How do I turn it on?"

"Have you noticed that people look smaller on the telly...?"

"Babe, I'm tired of staying in and watching Netflix every night. How much is Hulu?"

"He's so used to someone carrying his files."

"I used to shoot first and ask questions later, but now I start with the questions."

'So we tell the media our board has lost all scruples, but is willing to do some handwringing on Newsnight.'

"The firm is very careful about health and safety issues. If you witness ANY accidents you're to press this big red button so that the media management team can come in to avoid any bad press."

"I loved the book and the mini series, but I wasn't so keen on the the record or the movie etc

Newspapers stink. Newspaper comics stink. Nobody reads them. They're old school. I read a new generation of online comics. Check out this one. It's called expletive deleted monkey. @#$% and @#$%? Expletive deleted and the @#$%? Expletive deleted in the raunchy adjective deleted house. It's a family strip. I'm going to wash out my computer with soap.

"You're suffering from defective media image. What you need is a spin doctor."

'And here's a look at our ancient ancestor after being thrown on a door step.'

"I'll read the will."

Child plugged into TV

Lost job due to downloads. Please help.

"Hey! That news anchor just said something completely unbiased. I wonder what brought THAT on?"

Gentlemen, the economy is improving...leak the news to the media.'

'So now I just download through my wireless broadband onto my windows media player, convert the MP3 song in Itunes, connect via USB and record onto my compact cassette tape'

Satelite television