Media Controller Gifts

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

"Next time be more careful where you put the decimal point!"

STRIP Hambone: Sucidal computer over company balance sheets

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DVD extras - the making of the boxed set.

Penguin Remote

Don't touch that dial! — We're experts, and we know what you should be watching!

'Could you ask him where he left the remote?'

'Tell them there'll be no retaliation, then check with the chiefs of staff, the media and our major allies what leeway we have in the adapted dissuasion department.'

As Seen On TV

'We're here to talk to your son about his website...'

"Well there it is in black and white gentlemen, we're in the red."

'A new study of people who watch television all the time reveals some shocking facts....'

"... And how long have you had this total fixation with T.V.?"

"What'll it be ... scary movies or scary news?"

'You can't vote him off, dear - he's the newsreader'

Accountant sings the blues

Ding and Dong.

'I hate technology!'

'I'm just working my way through my DVD boxset of The Complete Everything That's Ever Been on TV.'

"When is it my turn?"

"The following program contains adult situations designed to make you feel bad about your life."

"The best thing about my promotion? I'll be in charge of the thermostat."

'I don't think that lifting the remote control counts as exercise!'

"A huge breakthrough from our research and development team. . . they've figure out a way to fool all of the people all of the time!"

'Gerald loves firing Donald Trump!'

"Babe, I'm tired of staying in and watching Netflix every night. How much is Hulu?"

All the stuff you need is here.

"To her, every channel is the Whether Channel."

'Better not circulate these.'

Consoles.

"I used to shoot first and ask questions later, but now I start with the questions."

'This little baby allows you to automatically block halftime shows.'

"Have you noticed that people look smaller on the telly...?"

'We can call it a library, a media center or a resource room, but we are not going to call it an internet cafe.'