Ac Controller Gifts

"The best thing about my promotion? I'll be in charge of the thermostat."

"Why do you need so many computers?" "One for billing, one for stock control, one for human resources, one for financial management..."

Homo Gamus

"The TV remote? So, I decide what we watch tonight?"

'We will be 3 minutes late taking off. . . the pilot has to piddle.'

"By labeling it, I control it."

Employee of the Month Parking

"Next time be more careful where you put the decimal point!"

STRIP Hambone: Sucidal computer over company balance sheets

'We've moved some fussy people, but she tops it!'

Two airplanes

'And don't be afraid to ask for directions.'

Santa knows he has to be more careful. One more accident due to pilot error, and the FAA would take away his pilot's license for good.

'Mom! Do they have traffic lights and stop signs in the sky?'

Jack in the Box Oxygen Mask

'I work at the airport.'

'Could you ask him where he left the remote?'

'What a control freak!'

Volcanic ash...

'Steady,...not yet,...hold your positions.'

'It's your remote. Hold on to it. Don't let other people push your buttons.' The kind of help men go for.

Christmas Flights

'That seating section is for video gamers only.'

OOPS!

"Well there it is in black and white gentlemen, we're in the red."

"I know it's a pie in the sky, Henshaw, but from a career perspective point of view we'll log it in as 'unidentified small aircraft'."

"Here comes the airplane--once it gets clearance from the tower, which should be in another 45 minutes. Thank you for your patience."

"You idiot. How many times have I told you not to text while flying?"

Delayed Departure and Late Arrivals

"My landing gear won't come down. I have a cramp."

"Who wants to go first?"

'It's all right with me if you go out, but you'll have to file a flight plan with your father.'

'The flight took off here...Then there's a big question mark over what happened next!'

"Be careful - we've seen an alarming increase in the number of plane strikes."

"Student driver"