Mechanically Minded Monk Pillows

"Could you go back to the front desk? The receptionist has some forms for you to fill out."

'I'm just not sure how much more I can teach you.'

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

"Hey, wait a minute! Isn't that our TV cable?"

"And the meaning of life is.... oh rats, the battery died."

"It's ok -- It's the Enlightenment Channel."

"I'm going on a retreat."

'We have to move - they're putting in a cell phone tower up here.'

"Bit big for a cherub, isn't it, Brother Ignatious?"

"The answers to the questions you seek could also be found on Google."

'No, Father, they're not praying. They're texting.'

Monks sitting at a row of computers typing up old-fashioned looking manuscripts.

"You're born, you deconstruct your childhood, and then you die."

'I wish Brother Gregory would spend less time surfing the 'net.''

Monster fixing boy's car bed.

"You've got a few screws loose."

Cable Bill.

Computer literate Monk

'I'd still be in a luxurious office instead of a smelly cave if I really knew the secret of keeping customers.'

"O.K., God – please delete everything I said today."

The most popular Sunday at St Clive's was always the annual 'Blessing of the Smartphones' service.

'The Book of Revelation is full of spoilers.'

Thou Art Here.

'I am not, metaphysically speaking, as loopy as you seem to believe.'

''Fasting' doesn't mean eating fast food!'

'Today's sermon is from St. Matthew, Chapter Five....'

"Do you have anything that will help me get rid of an irritating mantra?"

A monk watches TV in his zen garden.

'Psst! I just realised something... I'm hella bored.'