Meat Alternative Explorer Pillows

For once, I'd like to order a non-soy-based tofu substitute. No more health food. I have Tofurkey.

"I used to be a vegetarian. Then I became a vegan. Then a fruitarian. Now I only eat manna that falls from Heaven."

"And that's where hot dogs come from."

Macho Vegetarian

Vegan Restaurant: ''amburgers! Sausages! RISSOLES!'

"Soy milk and rice milk are okay but I prefer grape milk.".

"It's natural, vegan organic, no additives, preservatives or cooking."

Nutritional Supplements.

"Whatever diet they're on, tell them what they ordered is PERFECT for them."

"We've gone glutton-free."

"Hey guys, I'm thinking about going vegetarian."

"I only invest in alternative meat products, so I reject the terms 'Bull' and 'Bear'."

Je-Hereford's Witnesses

'What's your favourite meal?' 'Seconds.'

'Exactly what is wrong with the pie? I'll have you know I paid a lot of money for that bush meat at the corner shop.'

"One skinny latte, and is that with almond milk, coconut milk, soya milk..."

"Check this out, a 'Grizzly burger', do they honestly think that we'll believe it is made with real bear?"

'Do you mind if my son watches you cook? I'm trying to bring him up to be a vegetarian.'

'I know why Max has suddenly turned vegetarian: His new girlfriend is a Fruit-Bat...'

'He's saying 'Enough bananas - I'm also a carnivore'.'

Go Veggie...

"I'm looling for ground beef that's organic, non-GMO, and doesn't contain meat."

'It's not our wine list. It's a list of gastroenterologists.'

"My veganism begins and ends with eating insects."

'Oh ya! I didn't tell you guys. I'm a vegetarian now.'

'Poppy - I have no issue with you being a Bi-polar, celibate vegan. It's just that your Aura's the wrong colour.'

"One gluten-free, lactose-free, low carb pizza."

"I know... everybody just assumes I'm a vegetarian."

Bar None

"I'll have the vegan."

"Actually, kale is toxic."

"We ought to give this diet a name."

"The cow was a vegetarian."

'well, then, I guess you're also lactose substitute intolerant.'

"It's over between kale and me -- I've moved onto sorrel."