Mealtime Magician T-Shirts

"Today's special is puréed sweet potato on cracker."

The louder the kid, the tighter the lid.

"Tonight, we'll be eating hot dogs with a mustard-ketchup-and-pickle purée, accompanied by peas lightly sprinkled with ketchup. Then fettuccine al dente with a ketchup sauce, followed by applesauce maison with a dollop of you know what!"

'No pudding until you finish your oxtail soup!'

'I sent out for everything.'

Come dine with me!

Domestic Goddess.

A slice of bread walks a tightrope between slots on the toaster.

Hungry child

'A little piece of advice, Verl. . . cut your sandwich loaf on a diagonal . . . that way people will think they're gettin' more.'

"Maybe if we added some pumpkin spice?"

The Witches Discover The Wok

'I hope you like this, dear. I got the recipe from Gordon Ramses, latest cookery hieroglyphics.'

Benihana style of cooking.

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

Party time.

Frank & Ernie's Diner. Today: Yogurt Surprise. We call it "yogurt surprise" because we couldn't read the expiration date on the carton.

'It's just some Pour 'n' Serve, Stir 'n' Blend, Bake 'n' Slice, Mix 'n' Broil and Chop 'n' Simmer.'

'We apologise for the delay to the yum-yum train.'

Flour, sugar, earth, air, fire, water.

"Voila!...smooth pastry." (Lady teaching chef to iron dough).

"Did you remove the bay leaf?"

"The secret of my success is combining eggs, meat and bread in enough ways to make an eight page breakfast menu."

Surprise in the salad bowl

You're the sizzle in my roast!

"Nobody truly appreciates the magic that goes into a good omelet."

"Tell me what you think of the menu. I wrote it."

'Bless this food we are about to receive, all except the broccoli. Bless the apple pie twice.'

Hot pot

"Who shaves the fennel in your family?"

"I'm making your favorite dessert, dear … seven layer cake."

"More?"

'Preparing free-range chicken requires an extremely patient chef.'

'What a day! - the computer broke down, and I had to cook manually!'

The legend of Chef Arthur.