Meal Magician T-Shirts

"Just a sec honey...Mommy has to cut this up into little pieces, so the vacuum can pick it up easier."

'I'm short of ingredients. What's a good substitute for filet mignon?'

"And there it is... Coronation chicken"

'There's something wrong with the slow cooker. I check it every minute but nothing's cooking!'

"The computer accidentally charged you $12,974 for your meal. The good news is we can get that changed within a year or two."

Scrounge

"Every time my wife has an accident in the kitchen, I end up eating it. . ."

'Howard's short stay in the hospital was good for both of us. He finally appreciates my cooking.'

'You'll find loaves in the pantry and fishes in the freezer.'

Lady with an inflatable dinner date.

'I love it when you cook - it lets me practice faking it.'

'This is Muriel's kitchen, where the magic happens -- you know, Voodoo and stuff like that.'

Domestic Goddess.

'After you with the camouflage.'

Magic to prepare food

Tsunami in the cooking pot.

'Help! -- I ate too much and I can't get up!'

"I gave your ‘compliments to the chef,’ and he’d like you to elaborate."

'I sent out for everything.'

Come dine with me!

On August 14, 2011 at app. 2:00 p, Derek Winslow made scientific history by converting an item of the animal kingdom into an item of the plant kingdom.

A slice of bread walks a tightrope between slots on the toaster.

Hungry child

"Maybe if we added some pumpkin spice?"

'A little piece of advice, Verl. . . cut your sandwich loaf on a diagonal . . . that way people will think they're gettin' more.'

The Witches Discover The Wok

'I hope you like this, dear. I got the recipe from Gordon Ramses, latest cookery hieroglyphics.'

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

Benihana style of cooking.

Party time.

'It's just some Pour 'n' Serve, Stir 'n' Blend, Bake 'n' Slice, Mix 'n' Broil and Chop 'n' Simmer.'

Frank & Ernie's Diner. Today: Yogurt Surprise. We call it "yogurt surprise" because we couldn't read the expiration date on the carton.

"An untested recipe. An uncalibrated oven. Substituted ingredients. And yet, the cake...the cake is...magnificent!"

'We apologise for the delay to the yum-yum train.'

The louder the kid, the tighter the lid.