Meal Time Magician T-Shirts

'We apologise for the delay to the yum-yum train.'

'He did?'

'I sent out for everything.'

Domestic Goddess.

Party time.

Frank & Ernie's Diner. Today: Yogurt Surprise. We call it "yogurt surprise" because we couldn't read the expiration date on the carton.

The louder the kid, the tighter the lid.

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

"Tell me what you think of the menu. I wrote it."

"The secret of my success is combining eggs, meat and bread in enough ways to make an eight page breakfast menu."

"Nobody truly appreciates the magic that goes into a good omelet."

'Bless this food we are about to receive, all except the broccoli. Bless the apple pie twice.'

What makes the flies in your soup "artisanal"? I know, right? Personally, I think it's just a lot of hype perpetrated by the flies. Menu.

'I love it when you cook - it lets me practice faking it.'

"I'm a strict vegan with dietary limitations due to specific food allergies. What should I get?" "A taxi."

'What a day! - the computer broke down, and I had to cook manually!'

"Today's special is puréed sweet potato on cracker."

"We'll have to eat out tonight - I misplaced the can opener."

'After you with the camouflage.'

'I still have time for both work and family - thanks to cloning.'

'Not beans on toast again.' - 'No, toast on beans. I dropped it.'

"Bear with us, will you? -- We're having technical difficulties over here."

"Do you have something for somebody with no palette, no taste and no money?"

"Tonight, we'll be eating hot dogs with a mustard-ketchup-and-pickle purée, accompanied by peas lightly sprinkled with ketchup. Then fettuccine al dente with a ketchup sauce, followed by applesauce maison with a dollop of you know what!"

'Carb or non-carb section?'

'There's something wrong with the slow cooker. I check it every minute but nothing's cooking!'

'Howard's short stay in the hospital was good for both of us. He finally appreciates my cooking.'

'Help! -- I ate too much and I can't get up!'

Tsunami in the cooking pot.

"Every time my wife has an accident in the kitchen, I end up eating it. . ."

"J'entends le poulet qui arrive!"

'The doctor said I was ready for solids, but not this solid!'

'You'll find loaves in the pantry and fishes in the freezer.'

'Are you still eating your breakfast? I want to lay the table for lunch.'

"And there it is... Coronation chicken"