Meal Guardians T-Shirts

"Of course I mind—they're mine, and I want all of them."

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

"No, Mother, I don't think Julian Assange is going to leak your recipe for fruitcake."

"This chicken wasn't cooked - it committed suttee!"

'Come on, Walter, you're wasting out time! Stop using complete sentences!'

"I mean, he does have a point."

"Michael, do your dinner."

"I am listening to my body. My body says yuk!"

'I hope he didn't write the menu.' (Pub quizzers comment on poor grammar)

"It's just that I would be more thankful if we had roast beef."

"Get the story and get it write."

"Thanks, but there's really nothing to do while the meat's smoking."

'Would you believe, humble pie?'

Mum ices cake with 'hands off'.

"The food must be good here. Look at the drool on the menus."

Grandchildren's Menu: Whatever's on your plate and no funny business

'Yuck! My creamed corn is polluting my mashed potatoes!'

"Snowflake, quit eyeballing me!"

An angel in heaven is walking an angel dog.

'Just as I suspected - cheating on our diet!'

'You mean, you cooked broccoli on PURPOSE?'

'Then that's one child's plate, one special, and one anything-as-long-as-I-don't-have-to-cook-it.'

"...brisket ...recipe. Hide it."

The war against ignorance

"Ciel! Supergastronome!"

"I'm afraid I may have murdered the trees."

"Chef, the salads are ready, the meat is seasoned, and you're washing your hands in the soup."

"Baldo, you promised to never bring up the subject of buying a car during mealtime."

'Beware of the dog (leftovers will be prosecuted).'

"If mashed potatoes are comfort food, does that make broccoli uncomfortable food?"

'We won't need menus. Just bring whatever is cooked. They'll eat it and like it.'

"In the kitchen preparation is everything. Here's one I prepared earlier, & here's one I prepared even earlier."

Watchdog Maddoff Type Fraud Schemes.

'I'm eating right now. Can you call me back when I'm not eating?'