Maturity Humorist Pillows

Immature Cheese

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

'You've got bats alright...now we'll just have to determine what kind.'

"Oh, great - They changed the Meaning of Life again."

"I used to drink to forget. Now, age-related, short-term memory loss takes care of that for me."

'Man...You age great!'

"Whenever it comes, Glenda, my death will be untimely."

T-Shirt reads: 'Out of mind, I won't be back.'

"Now, let’s talk about your attachment issues."

'Do you know how much it cost me to LEARN all this psychobabble?'

'Look at you. You're a basket case.'

"Legally, I have the right to talk as slowly and boringly about all your options as I want."

"Actually, I'm pretty sure aging naturally and aging gracefully are mutually exclusive."

'I wonder if you'd go out with me. I've always wanted to go to couples therapy.'

The Devil making snow angels.

Man Gives Computer Therapy/

Middle Age: When an 'All Nighter' means you didn't have to get up to pee!

'Actually, I'm a placebo psychiatrist.'

"Therapist: Six couches no waiting"

"Every now and then, I get an overpowering urge to wear a cowbell."

'of course it's not natural: He dyes his mane to cover up his grey hair...'

"Lemonade App: $1"

"My inner child just turned 62. Where's his money?"

"So, Michael, any pesticidal thoughts today?"

"I don't think your old sports jersey shrunk. I think you grew."

Short on top, medium on the sides, and not bald in back.

Psychobabble.

"Warren's too cautious to cure his mid-life crisis with a motorcycle, so he's rebelling by driving shirtless."

Fakir Shrink.

"What do you mean, 'I'm in good shape for a man of forty'? I'm only twenty-six!"

"I call him auction man - his hair is going, his teeth are going, his sex drive has gone."

'Face it dear, we are as old as we look!'

'It's really nothing - Looks like baby boomer age spots.'

Shrink's Summer Job