Mattress Wrangler Gifts

Mel wakes up on the wrong side of the bed.

'I'd say your caravan's a tad overloaded, sir.'

Mittens is challenged by the string.

High Riders of the Old West

"Excuse me, but I believe you are in my seat."

A trevor of trainspotters

"The good news is we've used up all our bad ideas."

'Hold on there Jethro! You know I don't tolerate that kind of horseplay in this joint.'

'There! Now he's tied to my satisfaction and ready for surgery!'

Shrimpsea welcomes car-full drivers.

I went a little crazy with the pet hair sticky roller.

'Did you want me, boss?'

'Thanks for throwing out your ideas, Perkson, but I have to throw them out too.'

'One ticket to wherever my luggage is going, please.'

Toastquest!

"My dog always knows when it's about to rain."

Fisherman get a good catch.

'Don't forget. When this photo shoot is over I get a bucket of shiners.'

Raccoons! Single file into the crate! Snake! Back in your hole! Crickets! Keep it down! Animal Control Freak.

"I handle chatty people for him."

"What's the problem Cowboy? Never heard of Cattle Driving before?"

Student rakes leaveslaundry in dorm room.

"Hold on, one more thing to go."

I'm not fussy! I'm stir-crazy!

'Ever wish we were back on Wall Street?'

"It's broken I'm afraid." "Will I be able to work?" "Depends. What do you do?" "Oh, I'm just a cowpoke for Circle 'Y' Ranch."

Christo's greatest challenge.

"No one is making you do anything you don't want. I'm just saying we're all headed for Dodge City and we think you should come along."

'Where do you see yourself not getting tenure in seven years?'

"Being a post-doc for thirty years can really screw up your life."

"Step One: Locate end of yarn."

Writer's Block

Before baseball, raccooning enjoyed a brief stint as the national pastime.

"Looks like we'll be walking today. The horses are staging a sit in."

"Technically I have managed to get that big old sofa out the door..."