Maternal Wisdom Admirer Gifts

"Mother, you were right."

"Son, it's time you learned the benefits of sitting around doing nothing."

"Nature speaks to me of God’s presence, yet God is a total stranger to the restless world of men." "Why the #!@* is there no signal?!"

'Listen! It kicked again right here. I swear it's not appendicitis!'

Open other end

'Don't worry about gaining weight after the baby - you'll run it off during the toddler years.'

"There has been a sharp increase in his cantankerousness."

'Mom is feeling sick. She caught a baby.'

"Someday when you have a kid of your own and you feel the urge to arbitrarily say no just because you can, you'll understand."

'Well, put a jumper on if you're cold!'

She's good, but Mom's better.

Pelvis birth canal exit: Width restrictions apply.

Funny how moms know when you're going to do something naughty at the exact time you're doing it.

'Don't come crying to me, son. I told you you'd turn into a lobster if you stayed out in the sun all day.'

'She's the primary caregiver!'

Single parents.

'It's no use he just doesn't understand the let-down reflex!'

Scale indicates the value of books.

'What I like most about my mom is that she always supersizes her hugs.'

"I warned you, Kid! I brought back up!!"

'Well General? What is today's inspirational message from your mother?'

"I don't mind having a bun in the oven, but I do mind not being able to set the temperature."

"I want to buy you a card that reflects the sacrifices you've made on my behalf, Mom. Where's your purse?"

'I don't resent taking orders from a woman... for 20 years I took them from my mother.'

'Mother knows best, Dear, so stop rolling your eyes.'

'Said once, and never again!'

"Me and my husband had to try sixteen times before I became pregnant... What a night that was!"

Life's Rarest Things

'It's a little read book... the sayings of charwoman mum.'

"It's done wonders for my back."

'Why spend $12 million on market research? I'll just ask my mom.'

"I'm not looking for absolute wisdom. . . just enough to get by."

Momco

"Nothing much. Just going to get rid of some belly fat."

"This time you can start over without the hubris of youth."