Maternity Admirer Gifts

"Nothing much. Just going to get rid of some belly fat."

"Someday she'll solve the world's problems."

'Ever since I've started showing, my husband has affectionately called me 'Three Humps'...'

"On no, the baby's breach!!"

A pregnant woman wears a shirt that says "Baby"with an arrow pointing down, while a mother holds a baby that is an arrow pointing up.

Maternity Ward

'I'm afraid this doubles your bill.'

Womb service: A special room service for pregnant Women

Open other end

"Sure was a lot of screaming for the happiest day of your life."

'Don't worry about gaining weight after the baby - you'll run it off during the toddler years.'

'Listen! It kicked again right here. I swear it's not appendicitis!'

Baby in womb chooses from multiple choice pregnancy symptoms...

Maternity tattoos

"Nine months in here?? I trust I can get out in seven months with good behaviour!"

A couple with a new baby

'Ahhh . . . he's got your original nose.'

Maternity Ward "Just call me the Secretary of Labor."

Pelvis birth canal exit: Width restrictions apply.

She's good, but Mom's better.

Birth canal: Keep clear at all times.

Single parents.

'She's the primary caregiver!'

'If you don't like fathers in the delivery room, where will you be?'

'How far along are you?'

'It's no use he just doesn't understand the let-down reflex!'

Figure 1. Termite queen maternity wear

"Well at least now I ca almost imagine the level of pain my husband goes through when he's got a cold."

'What I like most about my mom is that she always supersizes her hugs.'

"Mother, you were right."

'Make love to me - I want to launch a range of baby and maternity wear.'

"Bye bye, comfort zone."

"I don't mind having a bun in the oven, but I do mind not being able to set the temperature."

'I don't resent taking orders from a woman... for 20 years I took them from my mother.'