Matcha Pillows

"You had me at alternative milk."

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

"Oh, God, no, please, no, God, no..."

"Sure, it's more efficient. But I still miss shooting the arrows."

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

"And there was I thinking you'd been Beta tested."

"Have you tried carbon dating?"

'Jane, cancel all my appointments for the rest of the week.'

"It evened out, for every free kick they got, we had one against us."

"When the dating agency said you were full of beans..."

They knew they were made for each other when their eyes met from across the room at the Same Socks Bar,

Isn't there something about this in th Geneva Convention

'Sir, you wanted an affectionate date capable of long term friendship...you said nothing about being allergic to fleas.'

'But Mum, I've got a match after school...'

"She says you sound like 'fun'!"

"Keep it up. His knuckles are getting really sore"

"I don' want another weather forcaster - they're too unpredictable."

Acme Dating Service

Cupid

'It just came out. It handles forehands, backhands and overheads all in one motion.'

"...and if anyone here suspects that the algorithm that put these two together might be flawed, speak now..."

'Top is right! He's a scaffolder working on a tower block'

Match maker

"AI can now scan dating sites and find your best match."

"Look,we'll settle this on penalties, not an American style shoot out."

'Dream-dates don't normally go for nightmares.'

Sidekick speed matching service.

"Ironically, I think I'm experiencing job burn out!"

"Nothing works with this guy. Would you like us to shoot the pool guy?"

Body language interpreters - "He likes you and wishes to dance with you." "That's a get lost."

"The preacher's wife needs a new hobby."

Captive Audience.

'Aunt Val's pretty cool. . . Kind of hot actually. . . for an older lady.'

"I don't believe you can't get close to anyone, Mr Jones. Get back over your own side."

Bowled out.