Master Of Practical Jokes Pillows

"I tied his line around this log, then I tug on it once in awhile. He's gullible, because it's been three hours now."

'Who folded the annual report into a paper airplane?'

"What's he going to do now, break wind?"

"Microwave to replace gas or oil central heating?" "Yes. Think how cheap it is to microwave a cup of tea!"

"I saved us a hundred bucks on a Jolly Jumper."

Candid Camera store.

'I love cutting trees in perfect circles because it drives aerial photography interpreters crazy.'

"Because when you go first nobody else has any fun, that's why."

'WD-40 un-sticks things that should move and duct tape makes things that shouldn't move, stop.'

"We are gathered here to morn the passing of Bob Opossum."

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

'What do you like about winter? I like these crisp, cold morning walks in the glistening snow.' 'I like how you can keep your extra beer outside.'

'I didn't tell you to 'be quite Frank'. I said,'be quiet, Frank'!'

"I'm giving you a 300% salary increase, and four months paid leave."

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

A crab with a utility knife claw

Clown Wife

"Okay, you scared the babysitter...now get back in there and rinse off that toothpaste, and go to bed!"

'Meaning of life? You bet! Here, pull my finger.'

Dog traps the postman.

Extremely Practical Jokes.

'Bummer Dude! No waves. Moondoggie punked me!'

'Many Happy Redundan... HA! RETURNS of the day, Mackay.'

Never pick a fight with a comedian.

"...Any more of that fowl language and you're barred!"

'Wait a minute -- you haven't said anything about a retirement age.'

Farmer chasing alien leaving crop circles.

Custard pie ejects from book - 'How to be a clown'

Boardroom cream pies.

'OK, who moved the photocopier?'

'She must be good at mixing cement - She's been making rock cakes for years.'

'I tell them it's for a patient in the next room and they don't complain about their shot.'

People leave joke shop with false moustache, nose and glasses marketed as 'the Robert Winston'.

'Ok guys, here comes the first of the day...let the fun begin!'