Market Memer Gifts

'City Traders - The Complete Menagerie'

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

Text Culture

Darren had lost his edge as a 'yes' man...

'As you know, medical costs have skyrocketed -- that'll be fifty cents.'

'We'll be outsourcing Main Street.'

'We're under a lot of time-pressure here, so we'll need to jump to conclusions.'

"Any further comments? Alright then, we're adjourned."

'It's been a tough quarter, so in lieu of bonuses, you'll all be receiving a DVD of out-takes from our meetings.'

'It was here when Harris decided to 'tweak' things a bit...'

"Does our improvement really need to be so continuous?"

"We're not doing virtual meetings anymore, Stu."

The Web is mightier than the sword.

Now, gentlemen, doesn't the smaller table make these board meetings more cozy?'

"Are you kids going to behave, or do I have to put my foot down?!"

'Can Mr. Sloan call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

'I need you to cheer up the investors.'

'If youth is wasted on youth, I'd just as well spend my time social networking.'

"Dislocating your jaw yawning during my lecture on work related injuries is NOT a work related injury!"

Accept cookies?

'I see your site doesn't have a 'like' button. The good news is it doesn't need one.'

The Evolution of Pop Culture Scapegoats

'Now, 'ol doc, he'd have wrapped 'er the other way.'

'Well the GOOD news is that the new software analyzed hundreds of thousands of potential customers to identify any that would have a genuine interest in the product...'

"And then I met some computer people who could make it look as if I were talking."

"Poison ivy? No, I said you have a poison IV. Honestly, I have no idea why we keep that stuff right next to the medicine."

"I hope they're not fake commandments!"

'He was a lifelong knee-jerk liberal until he got knee replacement surgery.'

'Norton, couldn't you have taken care of that before the meeting?'

"If a stock falls in the market and no one's around, does it really lose its value?"

'I had to co-pay for the bagel.'

Stock Market.

America's Funniest Encrypted Passwords

'There have been some mutterings that the partnership council is just window dressing...'

I've spent much less time with other people recently, but my refrigerator and I have never had a closer relationship.