Maritime Themes Gifts

'Doc says I'm in ship-shape.'

Senta looks at portrait of Flying Dutchman

For his next book, he would write an epic novel of the sea.

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

'Cannonball!'

When laundry ruled the waves.

Sailor in Car.

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

Emergency Phone.

"As I was only saying the other day..."

'Maybe it should be funnier...'

On the brink.

Old sea captains queue to see Monster Whale Revenge.

'If we get out of this alive, I'm going to have a darn good look at your resume.'

Sea weed harvest.

Captain Corcoran, Commander of H.M.S. Pinafore

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

"Shred the plank."

Captain Hook getting his hook stuck in the rail, again

Cat scratches on a pirate's wooden leg.

'It's the pink spot, Jim lad - them rascals is going to try and tweak my nipples!'

Subwoofer

"As night falls, You return to claim what isn't yours. . . come at me, sea devil!!!"

"There she be, lads, the special economic zone!"

Bob liked a challenge, and the shipwreck gave him something to get his teeth into.

Tugboat tugging Iceberg

'No Jake, I don't want to watch you do it again.'

On the plus side, I'd wager a lot of you folks back there had never seen an iceburg up close before.

"Call me Ishmael."

Pirate captain: 'I'm so embarrassed! I walked around all day with my swash unbuckled!'

"Oh No!!!...Cap'n...Iceberg...Dead ahead!!"

"We're gonna make, Rose! Keep washing your hands!"

"You're absolutely sure my wife won't be able to find this?"

A castaway on an island with an old TV that's washed ashore, sees two men in an approaching boat marked, 'TV Licensing'.

Suez Canal Curse