Maritime Tales Gifts

LOST AND FOUND, 'Maybe he flew south.'

Sea yarns.

"A plaster on yer knee, not much of a pirate, are we?"

'So Captain Ahab, I put it to you that you were deliberately stalking my client!'

Naval Veterans Drinking at Greenwich Pub

"Sorry, Rick, but no thongs means no thongs."

Pirates: "To absent Limbs."

"Call me, Ishmael."

"Now you're just being a jerk!"

A mermaid is on a rock at the sea: A mermaid falls in lover with her upper half and a shark falls in lover with her lower half.

"Call me Ishmael."

"Re-calculating, arrive at your final destination in six...five...four..."

"My new book will be an epic novel of the sea."

'THINGMY ON THE PORT BOW!! You know, what's it called? Long and pointy... Very fast... TORPEDO ON THE PORT BOW!!'

"Sorry Capt., but it's a pretty bad termite infestation..."

"Someone here has gobbled down all the food rations..."

Flying Dutchman

Contended beaver nurses a full stomach having eaten the captains wooden leg.

Refueling at Sea: Library Ship

'Maybe I should abandon my crew and keep all the treasure for myself!'

'FIRE A... warning shot across her bow.'

"Same ship, different day."

'It's Mooby Dick'

So Lonely 'Twas (The Rime of the Ancient Mariner).

"Damned fine divorce lawyer you turned out to be - when you said I'd have to give her half of everything, I never thought for one minute..."

"I can't tell a lie, Samantha. I'm a two bird bloke."

Newly amputated arm points to captain Hooks' cabin.

'You've got a slight shiver of your timbers.'

Illustration for 'A Wrinkle for the Coastguard'.

Sooner or Later

Confessions of a Lighthouse Keeper.

"It's a 'Dear Long John' letter."

'Well, here we are... stranded on a cliché.'

Octo-Pirate

Sailors eating a mermaid