Nautical Theme Gifts

'You say you've passed all your pirate exams?'

Referee knocked unconscious at football match by a ship in a bottle thrown by a sailor

'Cannonball!'

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

Captain in a storm

'So Captain Ahab, I put it to you that you were deliberately stalking my client!'

Sailor in Car.

"It was a lot more satisfying before 'catch and release.'"

Upper class child with toy cruise ship.

On the brink.

'Maybe it should be funnier...'

Emergency Phone.

Goldfish bowl on raft...

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

"I got a swiss army hook!"

Old sea captains queue to see Monster Whale Revenge.

'It's the pink spot, Jim lad - them rascals is going to try and tweak my nipples!'

Captain Hook getting his hook stuck in the rail, again

Cat scratches on a pirate's wooden leg.

"Shred the plank."

Moustached gentleman

Lighthouse Beam.

Pirate

Captain Corcoran, Commander of H.M.S. Pinafore

Subwoofer

"Call me, Ishmael."

"As night falls, You return to claim what isn't yours. . . come at me, sea devil!!!"

"I find parrots have a tendency to fly away"

'No Jake, I don't want to watch you do it again.'

Captain Ahab (Ret.)

Bob liked a challenge, and the shipwreck gave him something to get his teeth into.

'Captain, there's someone pissing in the hold!'

'A xebec and fluyt passed a heptad of shilpit grugrus.'

"Call me Ishmael."

Pirate captain: 'I'm so embarrassed! I walked around all day with my swash unbuckled!'