Maritime Mirth Gifts

'You didn't go down with shi-ip! You didn't go down with the shi-ip!'

Periscope sighting

"This should send the midwife off in a frenzy."

"Garden variety allergies."

Comicron

'Who wants to be examined first?'

"I feel like tearing of all your clothes and putting them in the washing machine."

Off Duty.

"Ever since the layoffs, I feel like we've been doing the work of twenty clowns."

'Can't you be happy without forever whistling?'

You need a sense of humor to work here, but you're overqualified.

'Hold it RIGHT there, buster! Nobody leaves the floor before signing out first!'

Victorian Royal Navy

Dead Men Tell No Tales.

"Can we not fly in a "V"? Victor broke up with me."

'FIRE A... warning shot across her bow.'

'Hey buddy.Pass that bottle of ketch up here will ya'.'

"His last words were 'Yodel-ay-he-hoo.'"

'It's bad news for the cabin boy.'

"By my count, that is the 27th last cast."

'Sam's not really a seafaring man but he can yo-ho-ho with the best of them.'

'His mother wants to know if you'll give him a haircut after you remove his tonsils.'

The velcro ties were in place. The lobstermen would have no idea what hit them.'

"I told you, no "funny business," Anderson."

'Next time make sure it's the bath plug before you pull it out.'

It appears the robots have skipped consciousness and gone straight to self-consciousness.

"But I can't help it if I smell 'Fishy'!"

'They're sure not making Champagne bottles the way they used to.'

"Why is it always snowing in that fish bowl?"

My bad.

"And this is one of the nurses who'll be blamed if the surgeon kills your husband."

'My husband must be floating on his back - I can hear him snoring!'

Cruise industry faces the Italian cruise ship disaster.

'He got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning!'

'A ship! We're saved!'