Maritime Jesters Gifts

Man flashing at a periscope in the middle of the ocean

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

"Now that we're into spring, we want to warn you that spring fever can be contagious..."

Richard the Turd

"Ha! Today we informed the boss about our rights!"

"As a courtesy for the inconvenience, please accept a voucher for three additional hours of your life, redeemable upon your death."

'The blond guy is a forward and the other guy is a wing.'

An Early Ventriloquist Meets His Future Dummy

'I take it his performance review went well.'

'Congratulations, you're now man and wife. You may club the bride. '

Cave lady about cave boy with big rolling stone: 'Here comes Junior with his report card.'

'Can we have a table near a handsome man please?'

'This is your idea of converting your boat to a sailboat, a sheet? And while we're on the topic, is that one of my good sheets?'

'It must be a milkfish.'

"Let's see how brave you are without your gun."

'Any chance of a bit of....er...Blue on Blue?'

'Sorry, kids, I forgot we live in Michigan.'

Nil By Ear

Intimacy - Breeding Ground for Mutual Grooming.

"To the most beautiful girl in the world... Happy Valentine's Day!"

"Bloody GPS-plotter is going silly again!"

'We must be nearing land. It's a discount coupon from the island's mall.'

' I hope you're not trying to suggest that I don't pay you enough Foster ! '

Vendor is the knight: knight sells hotdogs.

Todays Special: Vented Spleen.

Castaway can't remembers how to write S.O.S.

Coast to coast walk.

'I'm not complaining, but the last time you took me out to dinner, Colonel Sanders was a brunette!'

Plato seeking platonic love on Tinder.

'Yes, they do contain e-numbers - But they're e-numbers that make you feel amorous!'

Help Wanted Signs Explained.

'Fancy a banana split?'

"Nice shirt. Is it made of boyfriend material?"

"You're not going to eat me are you? Have you never heard of mad worm disease?"

"People often think management is glamorous, that we spend all our time engaging in high profile decision making."