Marital Retreat Gifts

'I want a trial separation, Malcolm.'

"You go on in, I’m just going to catch up with the moon for a few minutes."

"Too crowded. Let's go."

Teaching a Sunday school class didn't end the way John imagined.

Adam and Eve: Reconcilable Differences

'Are we there yet? Huh? Have we achieved Nirvana yet? Huh, have we?'

Scurile travels

"I'm going on a retreat."

Don't you worry JB, everything is fine here.

Monk on the beach

'You know, if we had a bed and breakfast, we could use it ourselves!'

"It's not what you think."

Priest

"It's either enlightenment or excruciating boredom."

Woman does a strip tease on a remote control.

'Separate rooms please, we're on our second honeymoon.'

'Lost in the Jungle I found this Buddhist retreat...'

'Today's Presentation: God's Miracles.'

"No thanks, I need time away from madness."

Busy thoughts of people at a silent retreat.

"Prayer does work! I wasn't picked for any of the church committees."

"I got married once - to avoid writing."

Lulu's Dating Service: Special! Adult summer camp...Dining, dancing & long walks on the beach.

Missionary Statement: Spread the Word.

"Tuesday is my day off - leave a message..."

Go away

''Fasting' doesn't mean eating fast food!'

'I told my wife that I didn't buy her chocolates because she'd put on a bit of weight...how many roses do you think it will take before she lets me back into the house?'

"He used to be in advertising"

"I always come here when I need to blow of some steam."

"Can I see your license Sir?"

Trump Twitter ban

"This ashram looks good. Every night after dinner they have a stand-up guru."

'It was a long trip, but the french fries are worth it.'

'It's SUPPOSED to be quiet up here!'