Marathon Junkie Pillows

A bartender serves a martini to a runner with the number 007.

'My feet are killing me.'

"Portrait of a Lady"

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

Running

"I'm weighed down with so many gadgets, I'll need a push to start me off."

Runner collapsing over the finishing line.

"You can either make a pledge or join us in this weekend's Barkathon."

'We're looking for athletic people.'

"I can't decide who gets the promotion, so we'll settle it with a rope toy Tug O' War."

"I told him he should have trained more."

'Good luck, everyone! Maybe this will be the year somebody finishes the race!'

"You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!"

401K

Prepare yourself, America. Dancing with the Stars is poised to present a new 12-week competition. And you'll never guess who's dancing now! Listen to the passion and fight in our newest celebrity dancer

Pentagon Science Contest: '...It's a contest by the pentagon. They're gonna pay out half a million bucks to someone who comes up with the best idea on how people could travel to another solar system.'

Jogging...

'His 5 hour energy drink timed out. If only he had taken it 3 seconds later.'

100k Desert Crawl

'Geez, I hate these fun runs!'

'I think dad's getting fitter. I couldn't hear him wheezing until he turned the corner today.'

'We're almost 1/8th of the way there.'

Olympic Torch Training

"All those years of dodging taxes and chasing investment yield have kept me in top shape, right?"

Treadmillstone

Health

Isn't there something about this in th Geneva Convention

Boston Marathon: The First Responders.

"Let's take it easy for the first two miles."

Apocalliptical

"At what point does slow jogging become walking?"

A tessellation of running figures.

Teddy jogging

Donald Trump

Runner's High, Runner's Low