Marathon Birthday Pillows

City Marathon.

'My feet are killing me.'

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

"Portrait of a Lady"

'This is the only part of my old Army uniform that still fits.'

'Your shoe's untied.'

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

'I'm ninety-two! Tell me what I'm doing wrong... I dare you!"

"One year closer to college!"

"The answer to bone loss is to bury them deeper.'

'Twenty years ago I began jogging five miles a day - could you tell me where I am?'

'I'm just not as ambidextrous as I used to be.'

Gary turns 40.

31. 19. 55.7.

"You can either make a pledge or join us in this weekend's Barkathon."

Runner collapsing over the finishing line.

Running

"I'm weighed down with so many gadgets, I'll need a push to start me off."

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

City Marathon.

"You're 5 years old now, Timmy. It's about time you retain an attorney."

"Remember, you're only as old as your peel."

"I feel off. I want to feel off and running."

"Your brow is definitely more furrowed than it used to be!"

"I told him he should have trained more."

The fate that awaits us all: creeping Rooneyism

Do you think I'm sixty?

'She thinks I'm out every night training for the London Marathon.'

Annual Swim Hundreds of Miles, Spawn and Die Marathon.

An old man exercising with hourglasses

"Careful."

'I don't think of my skin as saggy...I think of it as relaxed-fit!'

Old Wine in an Old Bottle

Cross-country runners picking up water and spare batteries.

'Good luck, everyone! Maybe this will be the year somebody finishes the race!'