Manuscript Enthusiast Gifts

Monks form copier service.

"For goodness sake brother. Haven't you finished that note to the milkman yet?"

"Moby Richard by Herman Melville" "Wonderful! Not sure about the title—let's discuss editor."

19th Century Hacker

Learning curve: 'Your book was crap!'

'I wrote what I know. It's about a frustrated author being rejected all the time.'

'Thank god for the spellchecker!'

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

"Oh great, the printer is down."

"It's about the murder of an editor who refuses to publish a writer's work..."

'Look, I never said salvation would be PRETTY!'

"For just one monkey in front of one typewriter you've come up with some amazing stuff."

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."

It's an autobiography of a guy who spent his whole life trying to get his first @#^& book published. Editor.

"By God, for a minute there it suddenly all made sense!"

Editor.

'You can't reject my manuscript without due process!'

"The arms reduction talks are off to a good start -so far, we've agreed to ban pebbles."

I'll be honest, Jerry - When you invited me to join your book club, this is not what I expected.

"There's the pressure from my public, naturally, as well as the pressure from my publisher, my agent, and all that. But the real pressure comes from that devil inside that makes me different from other men, that makes me a writer. But, of course, you know all about pressure, grinding out those papers at Sarah Lawrence."

Publisher to writer: 'It was a great read, except I collided with run-on sentences, tripped over broken English and got knocked about by a dangling participle.'

"We do not usually acknowledge unsolicited manuscripts, but we want you to know that we tore yours into tiny pieces. Yours sincerely, The Op-Ed Page."

"Your book stinks—we want to publish it."

A monk illustrates a manuscript with emojis

'Your new book is full of mistakes: the critics will have a field day.'

Rubbish, Poppycock, Balderdash

The Archbishops says to stop adding emoticons.

Jesus wept

"Hypochondriac's handbook. A little passion project I'm working on;, or, rather, I would be working on."

Proceedings of the club

Amimated illuminated Manuscript

"See, that's the problem with you new breed. You take rejection too personally."

'Look on it as... constructive criticism.'

"I just want to say thanks for getting me into this writing group."

"We'll publish your book, doctor, but we'll have to get a second opinion."