Manicurist Gifts

"Your nails look much better. But that wasn't why I gave you the file."

Woman files God's nails.

Emergency numbers on a telephone.

Manicure - "Would Madam like the house red?"

'My other son got me a gift card to the hardware store.'

'Goodness, have you been clawing your way to the top?'

'If you don't stop biting your nails, you're going to ruin your teeth.'

'Hold on - the manicurist's on her way!'

'Can you a bit of paint on these?'

Have a drink with me tonight. I can't I'm married. Tell your husband you're working. Tell him yourself, he's shaving you.

'She has to stay inside. She just had her nails done.'

'Mom sure goes to the doctor a lot. She's always going to get something called her mani cured.'

"Every Thursday I do her nails."

Cuticles Ugly-cles.

'My best client? You must be kidding. When she comes I work like for four people but I only receive one person's tips.'

'Thank you for noticing, Shirley - but beauty comes at a price, It hampers my hunting, limits my berry picking and typing's a real pain,'

"You have a long life line... and where DO you get your nails done?"

Nail Gun Manicure

Veni, Vidi, Vici, Mani, Pedi.

'You don't know how lucky you are having tentacles instead of arms. I spend a fortune in manicure.'

"She tried to apply her press-on nails with an iron."

Nail bar

"It's a holiday gift for my manicurist"

"Trimmed, but not so much that I can't claw up the furniture."

Toe Nail

"I see you shaved your legs...for your boyfriend?"

Octopus Manicure.

Our manicure special today is 'Text Message Tips.' I contour your nails so you can hit all those tiny little keys!

'I think your 10 o' clock appointment's arrived.'

Carrie White found a manicurist who makes house calls.

'Go ahead. I just love to have my nails cut.'

'So what are you doing tonight, babe?'

"Pedicure is booming, but manicure is dead."

Manicurist wanted by shipwrecked man

'Not again?!! A perfectly good game spoilt by dirty fingernails.'