Manicure Lover Gifts

'Now, look at what you made me do landing your old bass - I broke a fingernail.'

'But Honey, I can't go for a kill now: I've just had a manicure...'

'This is DESTROYING my manicure, Steve!'

The adoration of the gels.

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

"I really miss being in a committed relationship, Randy." "Which part do you miss most?" "Having someone disagree with you over what you're going to eat, or over what TV shows you're going to watch? Or do you miss having to account for how you spend your time? Or having to explain why you bought yourself something awesome without first getting permission?" "Mostly I miss the back rubs. They don't ask you to wash the dishes first at massage parlors."

'Be ready in a minute - just have to put on my face.'

"I don't like your application."

'You're much better than my mom. You can hardly tell when she paints her face.'

"That product you are using is fantastic. Your eye bags are gone."

'Mona Lisa, would it make you happy if I gave you a foot massage every night?'

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

"Every Thursday I do her nails."

'You're on Deck! Wilson! Hurry up with that pedicure!'

What're you doing today, Darlene? Power relaxing. 9 to 10:15 I'm reading the paper. 10:20 to 11:30 I'm getting my nails done while reading Catch 22 for my books club. 11:45 to 1, I'm eating lunch, catching up on calls, paying bills then kicking back on the couch from 1 to 1:15. The afternoon is sheer bliss. Yoga from 2-3, Pilates from 3-4, massage from 4-5, meditation 5-6. Now move. Please now! You're interfering with my relaxing. How the type-A spend their Sundays. 10:02, bathroom break. Everyo

"I see you shaved your legs...for your boyfriend?"

'We do not do belly rubs, if that's what you are looking for.'

'If you don't stop biting your nails, you're going to ruin your teeth.'

'-and we offer trauma counselling at no extra cost!'

"I told you to stop biting your nails."

Flo discovered that one of the perks of cancer was that even reluctant friends were willing to give her foot massages,

Level up your game with a MANicure.

"Relax. I'm just here to trim your nails."

The Manicure.

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: A Bob Named Sue

"Shoulder work ahead"

'But boss, this will keep my muscles from getting fatiqued.'

"Looks like Mom is practicing getting her mask ready for Halloween tomorrow."

"Ed can't figure out if we're having our nails waxed and our faces painted, or our nails painted and faces waxed."

"We're running a little late. The Mrs. is still putting on her face."

Chair massages.

Dang, another calling. This time, Avon.

Whatever look you were aiming for..you missed!

"I said I wanted to go to Stacey's Nail Bar."

"Honestly Xanthe. You really need to start spending more on the lipsticks you lend me."