Management Mocker Gifts

"Excuse me, Mr Newton, but some of the employees think that your promotion has gone to your head."

Mismanagement Consultant.

'Every man has his price, Peterson. I've decided yours is £2.75.'

"Less hair doesn't mean less work!"

'Of course we're making a lot of mistakes - this is a dummy corporation.'

Desk plaque: 'P. Burnside, Upper-Echelon Nincompoop'

Memo to all departments: NO!

'I've collected my memos into one reasonably priced gift book.'

'Please, sir -- I appeal to your common humanity!'

"I suppose you want the rest of the day off!"

"Three weeks on a management training course and the only thing he remembered was how to delegate!"

"Just you wait until this firing freeze is over!"

"Best project manager we ever had."

'I'm an extremely general practitioner.'

"The beatings will continue until the morale improves!"

'Are you sure it's non-drowsy? I cannot afford to oversleep...'

'Please excuse my nurse -- this is her first day on the job.'

"Well, I guess that old saying really is true: the squeaky wheel gets the grease!"

"You know they're trying too hard when the chef's special is Corn Dogs Bordelaise."

Mountain escalator.

Earplugs £2 a Pair

"I didn't mind the moustache, Cosgrove, But we definitely have a 'No mustachio' policy."

Fishermen catch a fish paint a 'No Fishing' sign.

"My wife says I bore people to death."

'Motivational poster,'

"So help me, Henderson, if you sing 'Row Row Row Your Boat' one more time..."

'The cross doesn't affect him. Let's try with a Star of David.'

Of all the days to sleep in!

'Leave me the figures on my voicemail... I never check it.'

'When you've seen one criminally violent, sex-filed horror play, you've seen the lot, I always say.'

'Hello, Mr Busino. I understand you're suffering from some drug side effects.'

Yoga Trash Talk

'You can't fire me. I fired you.'

Jesus' bones.

Zoo keeper throwing food to himself.