Mailman Humorist Gifts

Envelopes.

"Oh, great - They changed the Meaning of Life again."

'I'm not afraid of commitment, but forever is a really long time.'

Santa called but you were out!

Dog flying with a drone backpack is attacking another drone delivering the mail.

"I see you mister mail carrier... that's it, just keep walking... don't even think abo—did you just look at my house?! Are you looking for trouble? Cujo ain't got #!@* on me."

"Mail's here."

'Wow, I sure got a lot of mail today!'

'Grrrr....'

"My scoop-back tank comes in Mango, Morning Glory, and Scallion. Don's Maori surfers are available in Iris, Mustard, and Prawn."

The birth of junk mail.

Beware of the Dragon

You Shouldn't Have

'Harvey, I'm afraid the dog has the mailman intimidated.'

Fine Print Letters

'You're out of '50 Great Years of Mindless Consumerism?' How about 'Celebrating America's Shopping Malls?' That one, too?'

'Dang it, nothing but junk mail'

"I've been a postie for 20 years. . ."

'Dang! My applications as a mailman, a football player and a dancing teacher got rejected. I guess I've got to go on hunting that stupid white whale...'

Post Office: Why Not E-Mail It?

"I found your cat."

The Consequences of an Interrupted Shower.

"I know a lot of classmates will say, 'Oh no, not another essay about mailmen.'"

Beware of Doug

You've Got Mail

'A late payment and a friendly reminder cross paths in the mail.'

Cable Bill.

'…and so you see your unfulfilled hopes and ambitions in the form of the mailman.'

'I know what you're thinking, honey, it's out of our price range but, wait till you see the size of the mailman's leg on this route!'

"I used to bark at the mailman. Now I just write a blog about him!"

Beware of the dog.

Carrier Pigeons

Crimy, Denis, it used to just be you. . . .

Neither Rain Nor Snow Nor Sleet Nor Gloom of Night Can Stop...The U.S. Male.

"We live so far away that the postman posts our mail to us."