Magical Playmates T-Shirts

"Broom! Broom!"

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

'I stay trim because of high metabolism. Theirs, not mine.'

'So far, I've taught him to fetch.'

Mixed Doubles.

Holding hands

'You caught it, you gut it!'

'I'm telling you Fred, this can of silver paint is going to improve your love-life!...'

Advanced footsie

Boy and his dog

Your spirit animal is a balloon poodle? My spirit animal is a balloon poodle!

"I'm so glad we enjoy the same style foreplay."

"I brought you a wig because you said you like long hair."

'You look gorgeous, honey! I love it when you wear your tentacles 'up'.'

'Ready Mum?'

Short-lived Neanderthal Games: Slap The Sleeping Dinosaur

Love.

"Wifey! Wifey! I've found the fountain of youth!"

"Isn't us talking about how I would never take a ballroom dancing class an activity we're doing together?"

'I'm sorry, Louis. I should have warned you that I installed a speed bump in front of the refrigerator.'

Puppy Love

'You certainly went to town growing all that lettuce so I've dressed for dinner.'

"Milk does a body good but champagne does it better!"

Frank, this is carrying safe sex too far.

'That's the last time I ask you to tie my shoe laces!'

"I know you're a cat person, but do you have to knock things off the table when we're out?"

'Henry, cut that out.'

Milton wonders if it would be possible to substitute scotch and sex for tea and sympathy.

You are simply the Greatest

'I told you that 2 month old balonie was cursed!'

"What is it about a tee shirt cannon that says 'foreplay' to you?"

Consenting Adults.

Oog is an expert at throwing stones at things - he's a "rock-it" scientist.

'So this is what you do while I'm away,'

"I just knew there had to be a better use for tomatoes than making boring old sandwiches."