Macabre Marvel Gifts

"Well, ya gotta go when ya gotta go."

'People soup again?'

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

"What are you looking at, four eyes?"

"That's an awfully large small intestine and an awfully small large intestine."

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

Noreldo, The Mental Marvel, Reads The Mind Of His Cat, Ned:

Grimm's Reality Tales.

"I witnessed something I can never unsee." "What happened, little buddy?" "Some guy walking out of the 'Wolverine' premiere shouted spoilers to the crowd that was waiting to see the second show." "A bunch of the fans who were dressed in costumes got so angry they attacked him." "I don't think I can ever unsee five Pyros and a Colossus beating a Happy Hogan with plastic flamethrowers." "Happy Hogan had it coming."

Phoenix

'I suppose an explanation is in order?'

Roentgen tries to figure out what he's discovered.

'I hate frisking magicians!'

"274 meters of bandage - It looks as though you're going to make the Guiness Book of Records, Mr Henderson!"

'As you can see, nothing up my sleeves...'

'I'm death for goodness sake - why do I have to adopt a more healthy lifestyle?'

'When is science going to explain the dark matter I find in my belly button every morning?'

"Chills, Randy. I feel chills. And I can't move." "And I can't remember the last time my palms were this sweaty." "This must've been what people felt like when they heard the Allies were finally invading Normandy on D-Day." "No way any movie can live up to this hype." "Wolverine day is almost upon us." "We are about to embark upon the great crusade..."

"I'll need to see your responsible service of alcohol certificate."

"And there we have it, gentlemen! The first full face transplant swap of twins."

A popular stall at the Giant Sunday Pack Horse Contents Sale in Newark.

"You'll have to speak up. Did I hear you say ou found the cure to shrink hemorrhoids?"

"'Golden' years, my a**...."

'It's a medical miracle. According to your notes you should have been dead years ago!'

"The good news is your back surgery has healed perfectly. However, it looks like you may have to go back for a second exorcism!"

Houdini's Dog.

'We dicovered that this cures hypochondria without administering it.'

A rabbit is followed out of a Magician's hat by a greyhound.

'I feel I'm going to turn into an accountant again.'

'I think it's amazing that they were able to reattach a man's hand to his ankle.'

"Jesus, walking on top of the water does not count as a bath."

'So, how's things going at work? We found a boot when we did your colonoscopy.'

"The 'intervention' got out of hand."

Welcome to Probing, Wisconsin, where a flying saucer awaits.

"Mom!!"