Macabre Humor Aficionado Gifts

"Remember that weekend in Saint-Tropez when you tried to eat my small intestine?"

BEWARE of man-eating palm tree.

'You're going to have to make some changes in your lifestyle.'

'You can just forget about the cake.'

Forlornaments: Tools to drain individual and team spirit

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

"What are you looking at, four eyes?"

Another day at work would be one too many...

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'

Emily Dickinson: Mime - "I think she's saying something about death."

"The Eggsorcist"

Grim Reaper Buying CDs...

"In hindsight, we shouldn't have had him cremated."

101 uses of a dead cat: disguise.

Grim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.

"Boy, this blooper reel from 'Manchester by the Sea' is a crack-up."

"How about if we just winter in hell?"

Fleeting illusions of happiness hour 5-7

'Wait! Let's see if he gets up on his own.'

"'Grim Reapers' was considered too offensive, these days we're known as 'afterlife facilitators.'"

'Because the horned one commands them to, that's how!'

"Who'd have thought old Harry would turn out to be a vampire?"

Herding lava back to the fire pit.

'I don't think you quite grasp our overall motif.'

'I had no idea would be a choice.'

"And this is our new HR officer in charge of morale..."

"Siri, find an ICU near me."

"The boss told me I have to start at the bottom."

Vlad the Wholesaler

"Are you Matthew Jones with a double 'T'?"

"Congratulations! You've made the short-list for who we're blaming."

'Any ideas on motive?' 'Only one, Chief.'

"Any references?"

'Wait! Wait a minute! Would you hold my glasses?'