Lycanthropy Lover Gifts

"Here it comes!"

"Oh look, Dave. There's a lovely full moon out tonight."

'I can't control my anger when people get too close to my kids...'

'Never mind singing it in rap... a simple 'I do' will suffice.'

'It's not meant to be a fold up bike, but the truck driver I held up for seven miles thought otherwise.'

Knight in shining Lycra!

Middle-aged guy spots an available convertible. The mating ritual begins.

"Do you live nearby by any chance? I hate to eat in public."

'Never, Ever...drive 56 mph on a 55 mph freeway in a sporty red convertible.'

Plight of Decent-White-Male-Middle Class Scapgoats.

"I hate this time of year."

"Really, Larry? Of all the things that could have bitten you, you get a wereduck?"

"It's a full moon somewhere."

Moths fly to Blackpool for illuminations: 'I'm telling you, you're gonna love it.'

Distance to horizon varies.

Preachers with far too much input

The Critic...

Family drive along avenue of trees in open top car

Devil driving a convertible with many tailpipes

'I like to stay fit. Or at least wear a lot of lycra.'

'Did anyone ever tell you that you look lovely under the glow of these energy saver lights?'

"Your new book, 'Help - My Head's Caught in a Pipe,' has been called by some to be semi-autobiographical. Can you comment on these rumors?"

"I can't wait to put them on."

"This room is always bathed in the most beautiful sunlight. Except at night of course."

The Best of Times/The Worst of Times

The White Whale Mounted On The Wall

'I like doing shampoos, it gets your hands clean.'

'Look at how the simple little creatures are attracted to the light!'

'You seemed keen enough yesterday when I suggested an evening of soft lights and sweet music!'

"Who do we know who wears lilac corduroys?"

The turning on the lights ceremony