Loving Parent Gifts

'It's one of life's little miracles!'

Happy Mother's Day...to a Wonderful Mum.

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

Cry babies.

"Look Mommy, hat!"

"I’ve tried to make this as painless as possible ... clearly I’ve failed."

Impressing dad.

"Those are the names of your children? I went a different route...I memorized my kids' names."

'You must be very proud Daphne.'

"Your children are adorable...and so shiny!" "Thanks. I them in dish detergent."

'She's just great with the children.'

"Mother, I think I'm good enough to exhibit on the living room walls now."

"Mom! Don't think of me as covered with sand. Think of me as sugar coated."

'Sure, a drawing on Facebook has coverage, but nothing wows the family like a spread on the fridge.'

Children's artwork exhibition.

'I know you're worried about Tibby, Mrs. Lutz, but we simply don't allow people to stay overnight with their pets.'

'I'm afraid he's at that age when he's into everything!'

"I told you. . . use your inside miming."

"I'll be a little late. I'm working a double shift."

"Whose turn is it to lick the knife?"

"Have mercy on me, Mama. Have mercy on Mr. Pitiful."

'I was an egg in the Easter play.'

'I go to St. Patrick's Church, I go to St. Patrick's School, and my name is Patrick. Is it also necessary for me to eat green food?'

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

"Isn't he the spitting image of his Dad?"

Pappa clown views offspring in maternity window.

'Well, he's definitely got your nose...'

"Werewolves of London..."

'If you can keep him clean for a day you can sleep in his bed tonight.'

'Where do I put the batteries?'

'Wow! Your kid looks a lot like you!'

"I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool."

'She posted her first blog today.'

'A generous layer of vaseline makes an excellent tickle repellent!'