Lovers Of Witty Poetry Gifts

'In your poem, you refer to my eyes as beautiful golf balls, and my hair as fairway grass. Are you, by chance, a golfer?'

Limerick On A Grecian Urn

Jorge Luis Borges

'If you must know, yes, I do sometimes fake purring.'

A Poet

Jump-Rope Rhymes For Adults

William Wordsworth

Geoffrey Chaucer

"Poetry? Philosophy? Just what kind of dinner conversation do you want?"

'Sorry I'm late -- the Principal held me for questioning.'

"I now pronounce you husband and husband."

That night, Neil Thomas declared himself the poet laureate of 1973 Sheffield Lane.

"No Eric, you're NOT funny haha. . . you're funny peculiar. . !"

"Shall I compare thee to an autumn day?"

Home Business - Wife.

"It's a book about how to ask for a raise, '50 shades of Pay'."

"Does it occur to you that the only thing separating us is a basket of bar snacks? And a flimsy basket at that?"

"Hey, David...what's a five letter noun for someone I couldn't live without...oh yeah, kitty!"

"What?! You didn't say nuthin' about this bein' a yo' mam joke battle!"

Salmon swimming up-stream, "Don't you get tired of overcoming obstacles"

"He's been talking to that cat again!"

Updated Classic: The Waistland

'What do you mean 'What would Jane Austen do?''

'You look lovely today.'

Limos, trucks, S.U.V.s, rush past me in a breeze. Passing by... without a nod, while here I stand playing God...'

'You're sexy when your mind is somewhere else.'

'Commons Bar' - "I would never vote to bring back flogging...why should criminals get for free what MP's have to pay for?"

"I came here because my photography work is suffering - everybody on social media says they love my abstract pictures. The problem is, I do landscape pictures."

'The wife and I have decided to nominate our weekly drink-free days as tomorrow and the day after tomorrow.'

The Month of January