Lover Of Witty Cartoons Gifts

Eskimos Rowing Out to Igloo

"What I don't get is why once we fly south we don't just stay there."

Cocktail menu. I already know what I want. Oh, I'm sure you do, but let's eat first.

'Go right ahead. I know you're bred to be mean and vicious, just as I'm bred to be altruistic.'

'I know all about 'dog years,' but that still doesn't make you senior man around here.'

'He thinks he's the cat's meow ever since he was made department head.'

Need to know basis

'You've got over-flight ban, Barack!'

"I have no problem with reality. It's just the occasional intrusion of gritty realism that I hate."

'Brand X, the wine for those with indiscriminate taste.'

Would you like something from the bar, miss? It looks like you might need it.

How Moms explain.

'It's a bill collector!'

Infant care worker is exhausted from sex injuries at hospital.

'Sorry I'm late -- the Principal held me for questioning.'

"He calls himself orange roughy, but I remember when his name was slimehead."

Golfer in a tree.

New chess piece: Cat - It can go wherever it wants, or not go anywhere at all.

"You must be the demolition team."

Play dead. We have to make them think their new sprays work.

"Mind if I have the guys over to watch some poker?"

"I can't shake the feeling that people don't respect me."

'However, the jurors unanimously agreed that Blogojevich is the politician with the best hair!'

Man putting his brain in glass before bed.

'We've talked it over, and we've decided to hold you for observation.'

'This vacation has just come to a screeching halt - My pocket's just been picked.'

"Incorrect postage, wrong zip code...it's your type we encourage to use email!"

'Don't use the sauce-it's insulting to the chef.'

'Do you have a reservation?'

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

"I mean, have you tried not being an Elephant?"

Sleeping Fish.

"Well there's certainly nothing wrong with your reflexes..."

'Between you and me, I'd rather be me.'

"I wish you'd shut that door! - Were you born in a barn??"