Lover Of Royal Antics Pillows

"Sara! Get me King Louie! No, I don't care which one!"

'Don't bother Daddy -- He fell in the moat again.'

"A kingdom? A whole kingdom? All I want is a horse."

"Hackers, Sire! They've broken through our firewall."

"Oh well, what does a jester know?"

'I'm not saying he's unpopular, but the Secret Service won't let me wear spike heels.'

'I don't know. Neo-monarchism sounds good...'

'When did YOU switch to a talk format?'

'Time gentlemen please. Come on, don't you have any kingdoms to go to? ! '

'No, no, no - I said do me a ship in a bottle'

"You can buy all kinds of stuff on the internet!"

King reaching for an apple

'Yes Sir, we do believe 'the customer is king', but that doesn't give you the right to deduct a 'Peasant's Tax' from your bill!'

"It is not you. It is we."

Palanquin Toilet Break

'There must be some mistake -- Kings don't pay for things.'

LUDWIG REX, 'I don't like it - It makes me sound like a hairdresser!'

'Hey -- this guy says we can skip capitalism and go straight to state socialism!'

'First you drop hints - if that doesn't work, you drop bombs.'

'We don't have the funds to build a huge statue of you, Sire - How would you feel about a bobble-head?'

'Scroll down, no sorry, scroll up...OK now scroll down again...'

Child playing king.

'I'm tired of foreign policy -- I think I'll go interfere in the economy for awhile.'

'He doesn't reign so much as he drizzles.'

"I'm making moatmeal. Do you want some?"

At last, Paul Burrell finds his diary.

'That's Lady Erica the courtesan's courtesan.'

"Just the usual stuff - 17 bills and half a dozen death threats."

Barry the XVI and Michelle Antoinette

"No, I wasn't abused, but I cut off my father's head anyway."

'That wasn't great sex, but it was fun!'

"Humanitarian aid? -- What fun is that?"

'When you say I made the cut, is that a good thing or a bad thing?'

"I fear he's the bearer of bad news."

'You'd be worried, too, if YOUR mother-in-law got a seat on the Security Council.'