Lover Of Humorous Antics Gifts

No caption (a mime holds onto an invisible leash as his dog barks at a squirrel on a tree).

Monkey Curling Lion's Mane.

"Bless You."

'When he drinks too much he starts eating bollocks.'

'Right, now learn this trick...'

Beer Van and Ice Cream Van

This is awkward, but I need to ask if you'd like to donate your body to science.

"He, Igor? Who are we to play God with its gender pronouns?"

'Well, so far the only ones to answer our fondue party invitation are the rats in our basement.'

'I told him that's where we keep the keys to his ride.'

"Excuse me, officer, but I believe I'm entitled to one mating call..."

Unemployed man given role as the 'gluten fairy'.

Making sure the pitcher is up for the job.

'You had me at hell.'

One day having a great personality was going to become a crucial evolutionary trait...

'I've written you a song' - 'Oh, that's very kind of you. What's it called?' - 'It's called 'I'll stay with you forever baby.'' - 'How sweet. Let me hear it...' - 'Ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, ai,

Florist delivers Cactus to Man on Bed of Nails

"Frankly I'm a bit confused. According to the genetic printout this gentleman is, in fact, a goat

"Several groups have claimed responsibility."

'You could have just TOLD me we were out of cups!'

'Pavlov's first experiment'

"I tied his line around this log, then I tug on it once in awhile. He's gullible, because it's been three hours now."

'There are no skeletons in the closets but you might have a bit of trouble with those in the back yard.'

'Oh yeah, I forgot.'

"Hey, David...what's a five letter noun for someone I couldn't live without...oh yeah, kitty!"

Vampire Humor

Golfer in a tree.

"The Pain may be due to your Yin and Yang being out of alignment, but humour me and lets see if your broken let is part of the problem."

'I'll bet you 'Laughing Joker' is playing another elaborate prank on us!'

Meeting Melanie's parents suddenly turns awkward.

'He was run over by our home. We live in a mobile home park.'

Dentist preparing woodwork drill for dentistry.

"I came here because my photography work is suffering - everybody on social media says they love my abstract pictures. The problem is, I do landscape pictures."

'You look lovely today.'

"I don't know about turning, but I was tossing all night."