Love And Laughter Pillows

'Can't you give the dummy mouth to mouth without getting romantically involved Mrs Wilks?'

"The meatloaf just tapped S.O.S. in Morse code."

Clown's Comedy Fart.

"Of course it's alien abductions! How else would you explain the, 'November Phenomenon'?"

"Why can't you just learn to floss like other men?"

'She loves me, she loves me not, she loves me...'

Judge to attorneys in courtroom wearing boxing gloves: 'Looks like you're both ready for your opening arguments, gentlemen?'

'No, you don't have hemorrhoids. You have a case of himorrhoids, has your husband been a pain in the butt, lately?'

"Well, I deal with death and carrion every day: Laughing is a therapeutic way of avoiding depression..."

"You were ho-ho-hoing in your sleep again!"

"I'm sorry I really can't take you seriously."

"Will you stop comparing me to your mum!"

Produce Fuji Apples. I told you that's not how "fudgey" is spelled.

"Of course you still make me laugh, just not out loud."

"I picked this one up in France while my wife had her hip replaced."

"Over the long haul, it's been a long haul."

'You've definitely mastered it, Richard, but not every song is appropriate for the chicken dance.'

"Boy, I get booed everytime I perform here."

"You have to have a sense of humour to work here."

Laugh break

'I was warned about online dating.'

Cracked Quacks Strip: Cosmetic surgeon mix up.

'I hope he doesn't pick on ME!'

'To this century's most obnoxious party guest...'

'He's lost his voice...'

'I wonder what that knocking noise is.'

"Because he didn't even change your name. That's how I know he was talking about you."

"Even after all these years, you can still make me laughso hard I pee my pants...of course, I dod that when I sneeze, too!"

'We've been married one year, Roxie...it just seems like seven.'

'...and that concludes the emergency procedures. Since we have a few minutes before take-off, how many of you are familiar with 'Amway'?'

"Okay, so I faked it...you happy now?"

I also scheduled a pickup after we finish toiling in the fields. Amish Uber.

"Being with you reminds me that the days are getting longer."

"See anyone who tickles your ivories?"

"The adult diapers I understand, but the adult binky..."