Love And Laughter Pillows

'Can't you give the dummy mouth to mouth without getting romantically involved Mrs Wilks?'

"Why can't you just learn to floss like other men?"

'She loves me, she loves me not, she loves me...'

Judge to attorneys in courtroom wearing boxing gloves: 'Looks like you're both ready for your opening arguments, gentlemen?'

"I'm sorry I really can't take you seriously."

"Will you stop comparing me to your mum!"

"Well, I deal with death and carrion every day: Laughing is a therapeutic way of avoiding depression..."

"You were ho-ho-hoing in your sleep again!"

"Of course you still make me laugh, just not out loud."

"I picked this one up in France while my wife had her hip replaced."

"Over the long haul, it's been a long haul."

'You've definitely mastered it, Richard, but not every song is appropriate for the chicken dance.'

"Boy, I get booed everytime I perform here."

Cracked Quacks Strip: Cosmetic surgeon mix up.

"You have to have a sense of humour to work here."

'I hope he doesn't pick on ME!'

Laugh break

'I was warned about online dating.'

'He's lost his voice...'

'We've been married one year, Roxie...it just seems like seven.'

'I wonder what that knocking noise is.'

'To this century's most obnoxious party guest...'

"Because he didn't even change your name. That's how I know he was talking about you."

"Even after all these years, you can still make me laughso hard I pee my pants...of course, I dod that when I sneeze, too!"

'...and that concludes the emergency procedures. Since we have a few minutes before take-off, how many of you are familiar with 'Amway'?'

"See anyone who tickles your ivories?"

"Okay, so I faked it...you happy now?"

"Being with you reminds me that the days are getting longer."

"The adult diapers I understand, but the adult binky..."

'Now this is my kind of fortune cookie!'