Lounge Legend Gifts

"Relax, you'll be out of here and back up on your couch in no time."

"Have you seen my onesie?"

5pm Happy Hour. 6pm discussion: what is true happiness?

A bear is sat on an armchair with old man slippers.

'Every time I turn my back, he's learned another one of your bad habits.'

"C'mon, you can do this! Be the sock!"

'It has to breathe for exactly 22 minutes; then I can pour you a glass - right after the sacrifice.'

Excess Baggage: Why can't airports provide a decent place for paying customers to catch forty winks?

"I wrote a poem, even though I'm on vacation."

Couch Potatoes

"I'm not 'just sitting here' — my mind is all over the place."

"In closing, I'd just like to say you've been a great crowd, folks. Don't forget to tip your waitress, and I hope this final number breaks your heart the way show business broke mine."

If you're looking for a good time, you'll find it; if you can't find it, it will find you....

"Now then Mr Parker - are you relaxed?"

'You made a complete fool of yourself at the party last night...I just hope no one knows you were sober.'

Man watches a cat enter a pet door to a "V.I.P. Lounge" in an airport

"Nice going, Larry. They're going in after your liverwurst and sardine sandwich that fell behind the fridge last month."

Lion Choir.

TV Remote undoes a man's trousers.

"Well, sometimes I'll just hang around and do nothing. Oh wait, that's all the time."

Mile High Club

Naked cocktails

'Why is so much easy listening so difficult to listen to?'

Wine Bar, "Am I not the most fashionable lounge lizard about town ?"

"Honey, grab me a seal from the freezer will ya."

"We're watching your side of the room with growing fascination."

"Thanks, but there's really nothing to do while the meat's smoking."

Chillaxing!

Patient to therapist: 'How is this supposed to help me stop being a couch potato?'

Singer and Pianist.

"The first rule of musical chairs club is... you have to get out of your chairs!"

Potato singing - 'Peelings,, Nothing more than Peelings,,'

Getting older is . . . when you start to dress for comfort rather than style.

"Why are they called sweatpants if you don't sweat in them?"