Lotteries Pillows

Lottery loser.

'I'm sorry. The possibility that you may have won $10 million in the sweepstakes won't do as collateral.'

"If I won forty-seven million dollars in the lottery, I wouldn't change a thing. Not at first."

'Health Clinic for the insured: Practice limited to lottery winners only.

'When I insisted on a prenup, how was I to know she'd be the one to win the lottery!?'

"Oh, by the way, as you were on your way down here your lottery ticket won seventeen million dollars."

'We will now announce the winner of the lottery followed by the names of the 4,397,608 losers.'

'Ha-ha, that's so random.'

Trying to make ends meet in a parallel universe.

'Floppo' lottery rebranding

"I just won the Euromillions."

"What are the odds? First he wins the lottery and then he gets struck by lightning."

'The cat does like having something to scratch.'

Don't jump! You haven't paid your five bucks for the office lottery pool yet!

'Since winning Lotto, I stay only in five-star hotels: No need for a shell anymore...'

"Okay, everybody! Time for our mid-battle raffle! And today's winning ticket is...numeral XXVII!"

Dogs enter lottery for belly rubs.

Hello National Rail Enquiries.. mystic meg speaking.."

"That's right! Publishing Clearing Warehouse and the Angel of Death are here to congratulate YOU, Harry M. Beemis, for winning our 'Good News/Bad News Sweepstakes!'"

"Those two are recent Powerball money. The people by the table are old state-lottery money."

'Has winning all that money changed him, you ask...?'

Social Security Scratcher.

"He's that lottery winner I was telling you about."

"You are already a winner and can now go forward to our grand draw"

"Sixth set of winning numbers that bloke's had in as many weeks..."

'So glad we ticked the 'no publicity' box.'

'It's just too much for him, poor love!'

'At least someone can afford to travel by train.'

New York Lottery Jackpot: Go to the head of any gas line, with police escort.

'Come back to eat here 20 times and you will win million dollar in lottery.'

"Me? Keeping winning scratch cards? Never!! Champagne officer?"

"I won the lottery. Suddenly HE'S MY best friend."

"This won't affect my benefits, will it?"

"Ooh, that reminds me. I must remember to put my lottery numbers on."

"if we had a $36 trillion powerball jackpot and we collected half in taxes, we could pay off the national debt!"