Long-distance Anniversary Pillows

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

'Progress of a bookshelf'

So Close..

"According to this article, snoring can result in justifiable homicide."

"I feel we haven't moved beyond parallel play."

"Dear Wendy, please excuse the tardiness of my response to your recent tweet from Hoboken."

Runner collapsing over the finishing line.

'I've stepped on so many people for the last 20 years to get where I'm at, and I'm still only a middle manager.'

"Let's see, I make it four suitcases, a rolling bag, and a tote bag... You sure that's enough for our two day trip?"

"If you lied about where you are from, what else have you lied about?"

Missing You.

"Yeah. But he's a handful."

"I can't sit down. Don't you remember? I worked my butt off for you."

'We would like an unspoiled paradise, but with lots of shops.'

WHO checklist

"I've heard this airline's got some unusual inflight entertainment."

"It's not bulls**t if we call it strategy."

"He refuses to talk and he never listens."

'...you said, 'it only gets a bit damp when it rains'!''

A traveler comments on the red in the sunset. A wine drinker misunderstands, thinking the traveler is referring to the red wine.

"Say! While I'm off in the Holy Land, why don't you find a little crusade of some kind that interests you?"

"Excuse me, but have you ever thought of play the mandolin?"

Did you miss me?

'Did you say psst?.'

Excess Baggage: You never have to worry about finding your way around those humongous new cruise ships. Your stomach will lead you.

"I thought the travel agent said 40% off."

"Ballroom dancing helps us over our rough spots."

Body Language - "Guess why I'm annoyed."

'We spend hours in the bedroom,but that's only because that's where the telly is!'

WPOV's (White People On Vacation)

Beauty and the Beast

Employee lays in his 'OUT' box

'She nitpicks all the time!'

"I propose we build a panic room."