Locker Room Banter Pillows

'Hey Kekyll c'mon you should have changed by now.'

"I really have to exercise more. I went from yelling 'Fore' in my 20's, to yelling 'Wow' in my 30's, to yelling 'Ow' in my 50's."

Good luck tonight, xoxo, Coach.

'...'Fire the coach'...'Fire the coach'...'Fire the coach'...'

When placed in the hands of the right person on a long vacation, even egg salad could be a deadly weapon.

'I found this bag of salad hidden in the locker room - who's is it?'

The locker room door suddenly swings open, and Randy is busted by a steroid-sniffing dog.

"Okay, there's one thing I like about school starting. I have a girlfriend this year."

'We've got a personal hygiene foul! Number 70!... Fifteen yards!!'

'Same tragic story...A disgruntled athletic trainer burst into the locker room and starts taping players at random...'

'Aw, come on guys - at the end of the day, it's only a game - right?'

'And don't shrink it in a hot wash.'

"Well, once again I find myself all pumped up with no place to go."

You Don't Know What It's Like

"He's brutal but considerate - that's his victims' support number, NHS direct."

'I don't need to exercise to lose weight. The odor in this locker room suppressed all my appetite.'

'Nobody will see it in the sauna. Besides, how bad can your birthmark actually be?'

'Okay, so we're 4 and 8 this season. Take away those 8 losses and we're undefeated!'

'I think it's time we got rid of the espresso maker.'

'Relax, the game is over.'

You were great last night

Size matters!

"Okay, seriously guys, who's not wearing deodorant?!"

'Athletic Trainer in the locker room...'

Locker Room. Ernie, on the radio they said your poor play caused eight sacks! What did the coaches think? I guess they were unhappy -- They were the ones the team owners sacked.

Just minutes before the big game Gerald realizes he grabbed the wrong gym bag.

"I was being honest with him, he said he was being honest with me, so now we don't know who to trust."

'This is the NBA, Doug. It's a whole new level. You need to stop referring to your locker as 'my cubby'...'

'I'm just saying - it doesn't help morale.'

'He took a pass and disappeared?'

'Let him stay, coach. He couldn't find his team's locker room.'

'You've lost a step...'

"Men's locker room. Caution: May not be as offensive as you've been led to believe."

Women after 10 minutes vs men after 10 years.

You Don't Know What It's Like