Localvore Advocate Gifts

Food production

Wifi in Hell

'Have you been 'helping the environment by supporting local produce' again?'

The eco club is starting a locavore movement here at school. "Loco" what? Eating fresh food, grown locally. So? So everyone eats healthier and uses less energy. Um � Ok. I'll tell my mom. Who are those people. Locobores.

See you at the farmers market!

'I'm afraid the cuts are beginning to bite!'

Local food for local consumption

"Everybody should live in a market economy. It's terrific."

"All our vegetables are organic, ethically sourced and stunned before being boiled."

"I love finding my food at the Farmers Market. Makes me feel like a true pioneer."

"Is his nose locally grown?"

Same sex families - it's about love, not sex, after all...

'We like to keep our supply chain short.'

'Could you tell me where the organic locally-grown vine-ripened union-picked kiwis are?'

'Right...so that's pages 1-6 on 'teenage thus run rampage', 7-9 on 'man sued £25,000 for cleaning neighbours path', the middle spread on...'

Progress.

Never on Sunday

'If you want produce grown on the farm down the road you'll have to go to Kuala Lumpur.'

"How about you? Were you 'locally raised'?"

'It's a feisty little potato of Scottish origins, with a reddish complexion, whiskery appearance, waxy character and slight tendency to small mischief; spring-sown into well-drained soil on the south of the Island it has been hand-reared by. . .'

"Anything in Mr, Rogers' neighborhood?"

"It's the closest I get to being a hunter-gatherer."

'Do you do anything other than coconut?'

"What makes you so sure our local farmers know what they're doing?"

"We like to know where our food comes from."

"Apparently the carrot is locally sourced, the whisky is craft, the mince pie is gluten-free..."

I shop locally!

"Our state made the list for being on the most lists."

MADE IN CANADA "Buy Canadian"..."Eh!"

"Is this from the community garden? It tastes sanctimonious."

'Hey! Roll a mile in my shoes!'

'If we let this happen, soon we'll be swamped in chain stores.'

Empty shops.

'I'd heard that they like to source their food locally'

You can redo my garden. Just don't hurt the deer! Ok. We'll rip out the shrubs they eat. We'll replace them and replant your flower beds with varieties they don't. Terrific! Here's my estimate. I hear the homeless shelter serves venison.