Local Law Enthusiast Gifts

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

"Sorry, kid. No off-campus drinking until you're twenty-one."

Ruth Bader Ginsburg - Forever Supreme

"We've also been given ten top employment law tips."

"Before we begin, I'd like to say that in thirty years as an attorney, I've never encountered a more interesting departure from the standard last will and testament."

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'

Violent Crime Statistics

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

"Don't even think about it! I am the property of the English Monarch!"

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

Lady Justice.

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

'Remember - do not try to plant the seeds from these apples. They're intellectual property, and they're copyrighted.'

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

'I thought he was joking. I didn't think my husband would really turn me in to the FDA!'

It Looks Like Trumpty Dumpty Got His Wall After All.

'If crime doesn't pay, how come there're so many criminal lawyers?'

"I was caught and released. But according to news reports, I remain a fish of interest."

"Impartiality becomes you."

'You were convicted by the jury, but at least you were acquitted by the media.'

'And your class story is an old, old one. In the middle of successful soul-snatching careers you were suddenly bitten by the lawyering bug...'

'Hello. My father is an attorney. This is how I allegedly spent my summer vacation.'