Local Drink Aficionado Gifts

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

'No ice.'

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

'No standing while room is in motion.'

We'll have Manhattans...

Happy Hour

You're the botanicals in my gin

Shaken not stirred

'I know it's gassy...'

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

"Another flue shot, Larry.

"When I was a child, I drank like a child, but when I became a man I put away childish drinks."

"How about we settle your tab from the regular season?"

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

'So it's the Mumm's Cordon Rouge, '98 Pouilly-Fuisse, '86 Chateau Margaux, and the '92 Barsac - would you like any food?'

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

"Quick, I need a drink. Someone just called me Ma'am."

"I believe you'll like our company. We pay our employees time and a fifth."

Prawn Cocktail Please

'Is this a party, a cheese and wine do, a cocktail party, a soiree or just another of your old cronies get-togethers?'

"In addition to the regular menu, today's specials are . . ."

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

"I do like a plant that can hold its drink"

"Scientists may need a trillion dollar atom smasher to explore the fundamental questions of the universe, but all you need is one too many."

'The King of what?'

Four olives and a toothpick on Newton's Cradle.

"Phil's an expert networker. One drink and he's on schmooze-control."

'I wanted this on the rocks.'

Man at work sees in lounge refrigerator, 'Creative Juices'

'Your switching to Scotch? And after I've given you the best beers of my life!'