Livewell Legend Gifts

'What do you mean you're not reaching into the livewell?'

"I say it's Kale, and I say it's spinaches shitfaced uncle."

"The knights of the round accent table"

Warrior Woman

The eco club is starting a locavore movement here at school. "Loco" what? Eating fresh food, grown locally. So? So everyone eats healthier and uses less energy. Um � Ok. I'll tell my mom. Who are those people. Locobores.

'The pioneers opened the frontier, but it wasn't legal until brave lawyers blazed the paper trail!'

Nurse pushing the Grim Reaper out of the Surgery room.

'This model is hard to get parts for.'

Veggie Hall of Fame.

'Told you to get your mower fixed.'

"Be or be not. There is no question."

"He's writing a novel for the first time in decades. It has less to do with the urge to create or say something new, and more to do with the fact that all his previous books are now out of print."

Biker Lawn Mower

Ted Hughes

Remote Control Pirate Ship.

'Hang on, we'd better leave this one alone: It's a protected species...'

"This lawnmower is a real time saver. After pushing it around for an hour, I forget about all the ambitious landscaping plans I thought up over winter."

September: All the familiar signs of harvest are with us once more.

Garden sprinkler in the form of a classical statue

Man mowing lawn that grows quicker then he can cut it!

"Class, welcome back Sean ... who, you may recall, was lost for eight days in Home Depot."

"Okay, if it hits the wall it's a triple, and if it goes through Mr. Baker's window, that's a home run."

'You've played enough. Why don't you reel him in now?'

Lawrence of Suburbia

'Don't Move!' - 'Why would I want to move? Lived here for 51 years, know all the neighbours, shops nearby, post office is closed but...'

Boy: 'DAD, the lawnmower's started SMOKING again!'

"Oh him, that's Ron. He's a permanent fixture in here."

The Specimen Hunter

"Ahem... mask please..!"

"Lawn fish. They're hell to get rid of."

"Face it, William - you're shit at it!"

Spring cleaning.

"This is probably the most mature, astute novel of the last half century that I've just finished. Me want ice cream."

"The new chief doctor will be the one who manages to remove this sword."

A Guide to Mustaches