Liver Specialist Gifts

"Waiter! Two cognacs and one new liver please."

'Is there another doctor in the house? He wants a second opinion.'

'But Timmy, you have to eat your antibiotics, or you'll never become a big and strong bacteria.'

'That which does not kill me, make me stronger.'

Coronavirus

"In our house the four major food groups are Bordeaux, Merlot, Chardonnay and Champagne."

"I need to self isolate. . . but I thought I'd better come in and see you first!"

"That new antibiotic seems to be working. Time to evolve again."

"...we have a heart-lung-kidney-liver-spleen machine."

The Canary in the Coal Mine

'Henry had a successful animal organ transplant - isn't that right, Henry?'

Medical Examinations.

'Catch this!'

'You tell me how to give them a fever, and I'll tell you how to make them cough.'

'Gastroenterology...do I know that?'

"Wow, what are the chances of that four letter word being in your alphabet soup?"

What if Pirates Were Born With Their Wooden Leg?

On board the MS Hepatology

"Doctors, Gilby, Beam and Henson. Ears, nose and throat."

Cuba detected a variant of HIV

'Drugs' 'Viruses'.

"Hibernate sounds better than binge watch."

Zika Epidemic

'I'm referring you to a specialist who isn't as afraid to die as I am.'

"We may have found the vaccine but it's fattening."

Proctologists' Office Party Games

Surgeon to other: 'First organ transplant?'

'The bad news is you have a disease that only a highly-paid specialist can pronounce.'

'Of course, simple mistakes can be done by anybody, but to really mess up things, you need a specialist: me, the IT consultant!'

A proctologist by trade, Bob liked to spend his weekends out in nature.

Trust Your Doctor

Daredevil. No. But it's been months now. I wanna talk about it. Well, I haven't watched the last couple episodes yet. Blasphemy! You have one job as a modern American consumer of Netflixian entertainment: and that's to binge-watch every episode the day the series is released. Sorry, little buddy. Some of us have lives. What's that supposed to mean?! Careful what you say around seniors. You'd never be man enough to handle a good Price is Right marathon! You distract it while I make my escape.

'I was hoping you could help me with an implant.'

Ebola reaches USA.

Contagious Diseases.