Liver Specialist Gifts

"Waiter! Two cognacs and one new liver please."

'Is there another doctor in the house? He wants a second opinion.'

'But Timmy, you have to eat your antibiotics, or you'll never become a big and strong bacteria.'

'That which does not kill me, make me stronger.'

"In our house the four major food groups are Bordeaux, Merlot, Chardonnay and Champagne."

Coronavirus

"I need to self isolate. . . but I thought I'd better come in and see you first!"

"That new antibiotic seems to be working. Time to evolve again."

"...we have a heart-lung-kidney-liver-spleen machine."

The Canary in the Coal Mine

'Henry had a successful animal organ transplant - isn't that right, Henry?'

Medical Examinations.

'You tell me how to give them a fever, and I'll tell you how to make them cough.'

'Catch this!'

'Gastroenterology...do I know that?'

What if Pirates Were Born With Their Wooden Leg?

"Wow, what are the chances of that four letter word being in your alphabet soup?"

On board the MS Hepatology

"Doctors, Gilby, Beam and Henson. Ears, nose and throat."

Proctologists' Office Party Games

"We may have found the vaccine but it's fattening."

'I'm referring you to a specialist who isn't as afraid to die as I am.'

'Drugs' 'Viruses'.

Cuba detected a variant of HIV

"Hibernate sounds better than binge watch."

Zika Epidemic

Surgeon to other: 'First organ transplant?'

'The bad news is you have a disease that only a highly-paid specialist can pronounce.'

Contagious Diseases.

A proctologist by trade, Bob liked to spend his weekends out in nature.

'Of course, simple mistakes can be done by anybody, but to really mess up things, you need a specialist: me, the IT consultant!'

Ebola reaches USA.

'I was hoping you could help me with an implant.'

"I'd say it's a fungal infection."

Trust Your Doctor