Little Winner Gifts

'I got it for potty training.'

I'm Bored With Educational Toys

Four children playing the flute.

'I'm sure that you are highly qualified. It's just that we're not hiring anyone at the third grade level.'

Child driving a toy car

'You're doing a play in kindergarten?'

Happy holidays for kids.

"I thought your show-and-tell was really brave."

"Still believe leaders are born not developed?"

Martial Arts

"My papie says I'm going to be the first in my family to go to college!"

No animals were harmed during the writing of this book report....

Gracie for Queen...of the universe.

Take a bow!

"So you can tweet. That's why you have to learn the alphabet."

'Guess what I'd like to see disappear next.'

'Music hath charms,' &c.

"First buttons, then zippers, now we learn to tie our shoes. Is mom trying to tell us something?"

'Books are okay, except they only get one channel.'

'I got an 'F' in penmanship, but it doesn't matter. I plan on becoming a doctor.'

"And I'd recommend this book to anyone in the market for a free plush toy."

'It's an '07 model. I JUST finished putting it together.'

"Timothy, success is nothing to fear."

'Did you know I have 3000 bones in my body?'

"Nine and three! Nine and three o’clock!!"

Back to School

"I am studying the alphabet. I'm watching ABC."

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN, 'It's okay, I guess, but they sure hassle you about compliance!'

'It's nice that you've learned to tie your shoes, but you're really too young to quit while you're ahead.'

'How 'bout finishing the story, mom. It's past dad's bedtime.'

Apparently I didn't learn enough. They say I have to come back tomorrow. Welcome to Kindergarten.

'Is there a secret handshake or anything I should know?'

"Yes, you should have studied harder and no, you can't unsubscribe from 5th grade."

"What are you doing?! Where are your crayons?!"

"He makes it look so easy."