Little Presenter Gifts

"And I'd recommend this book to anyone in the market for a free plush toy."

Showbiz Awards

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

"My political platform focuses on more ice cream and more frisbee chasing, with less chores and fewer baths."

"I'm razzled, but not dazzled."

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

"A dozen eggs and a pint of semi-skimmed...Sorry, looks like I left my presentation in my other coat."

"I don't believe I've missed a single sign since you made the switch to Power Point."

Four children playing the flute.

'These are the end of year figures recollected in tranquility.'

'Ted, I really wish you'd update your presentation software so we could do away with the 3-D glasses.'

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

"You're 5 years old now, Timmy. It's about time you retain an attorney."

'You're doing a play in kindergarten?'

'It's perfect, but can we see it in white?'

"Let me now direct your attention to the pepperoni."

'For the actress who benefitted most by rehab...'

"I thought your show-and-tell was really brave."

"I don't know what I'm going to do...my presentation is due on Monday and I haven't even started...I'm not sure I know how to speak."

Presentation skills.

Convention for People Who Like to Attend Conventions.

"You're using the boogeyman as an excuse to shut me out."

Take a bow!

'I'm now going to open the floor to questions.'

'...The good news is the Guggenheim has offered $2,500,000 for our chart.'

'Do you know what I miss? - Chalk talks!'

How to engage an audience

"Here we mark our data points, but the real fun is connecting the dots!"

"Maybe the pie chart should have been refrigerated."

Sir Patrick Moore.

"No, it hasn't anything to do with my presentation. But wait until you see how I hold everyone's attention with it sitting next to me at the podium."

'I know, we'll lead off the presentation with me telling an incredibly long and seemingly pointless anecdote about the time I burned my finger while lighting the back yard grill...'

'I can't wait for Power Point.'

"Dad, has there EVER been a time when James Corden was funny..?"

"In preparation for his appearance before the foundation board, Rodney fine-tunes his song and dance."